Monday, February 20, 2012

Playing Dukes of Hazard on a Frosty Day

My MIL had this wonderful experience the other day. She had a great attitude about the situation. I had to share with you her view on what happened.

image from here

Let me tell you about my adventures yesterday. Maybe I already told you there is a little Christian school a few miles from here that needed a sub teacher so they contacted me to see if I could help out. I was happy to help them. It is so much fun to work with the kids. Last week I was asked to cover a whole week in kindergarten. I couldn't wait!! I bubbled daily as I love that age group.

Thursday night the weather man said to watch out for Friday fog. On Friday, no fog was seen so I was feeling spiffy do and ready to get to school.

The weather was perfect or so I thought. I was driving down a twisty country road with a couple of tricky corners. I thought I got a flat tire, but soon discovered it was black ice  that I was fish tailing on.
I swerved this way, then that. Suddenly the back end floated to the opposite direction and I was a ditch. It didn't appear deep, yet I was down low, very low, in a deeply rutted ditch.

I was able to roll my window down  and, not wanting to get muddy, I carefully climbed out. I was half afraid the car would finish rolling over so I rather scooted  quickly. A lady came to my rescue so I could warm up in her car. She proceeded to call a cop in case there was more serious damage. I was  on my way to work at the Christian school so I had on a fashionably long skirt. About a half hour later a policeman crept closer to evaluate the car.

The lady said: "He's running your tags."

Me: "Yes, that's a good idea. I assume I look like criminal material wearing my skirt and a parking my car in this ditch without legal permission."

The lady and I laughed.  We shared a few pleasantries and then she was on her way.

The mid-thirty-something cop (squinting his eyes, doing a double take... and a triple take, glanced at my car and then looking at me) asked a few questions then he examined the situation much closer. The story goes something like this.

Policeman: "I have to ask! How on earth did you get out of there with about 18 of clearance space between the car and that ditch?"

Me: "Well, there was nobody around so I hiked my skirt, stretched my leg and climbed out."

Policeman: "No, really. You have to explain this to me. Wait a minute." (He came right out and laughed.)

Policeman: (Eyes wide open, eye brows raised and smiling in disbelief) "You are telling me that you played "Duke's of Hazard" and climbed out of that window, through that little bit of space between the ditch with the car that is sitting at THAT angle?"

image from here

Me: (Smirking) "Well, you can see that I'm outta there so you know I had to have climbed out."

Policeman: (giggling)  "Seriously. What are you? About 36?"

Me: (Snickered a little, too.) No, Sir. I will be 56 in April."

Policeman: "WHAT??? You, a 56 year old, playing  Duke's of Hazard through an 18 inch opening, on a cold day, no less.  Are you OK?" (Asking only because he has to, I assume, because he was seriously chuckling as he spoke.) "You know I'm going to tell this."

Me: "I'm running a little late for work because someone took his sweet  time gettin' to me and my Duke's of Hazard Honda Accord. Running late is not normal for me."

Policeman: "Well, one of knows there is black ice on the road so taking my time is a good thing. There is no reason for me to write this up. Do you want me to call a tow truck?"

Me: "I think I would rather ask this farmer for help so I can get a move on."

Policeman: "You go ahead and ask if he can help. I will wait here for you."

I walked to the back door of the farmer to ask if he would mind  pulling me out with his tractor. He said he doesn't pull people out as much as he use to because it happens far too often. This time he kindly obliged telling the cop and me that I was the 4th person to be pulled out of that ditch within a 24 hour period and he didn't do the pulling, but by the look of his ditch that is why my car was snuggling up to the other side of the ditch. The cop patiently waited with me while the farmer scraped the ice from his tractor to assist this damsel in distress.

Policeman: Hey, usually truck owners love to stop and help when a la.., well, when someone is stuck. They buy trucks because they like to help people. Hey, Mary? You know you will have to climb back inside your car Duke's of Hazard style in reverse to steer your car to get it out of the  ditch when the farmer pulls you out. Don't you?"

Me: "Nahhhhhhhhh. No way. C'mon. Can do that for me? You can climb in the higher other side, while I hold the door open for you. I promise to ignore any mud you get in my car."

He did climb in and my car was out in just a few minutes. The farmer didn't let me pay him. He and the cop told me it was a blessing for them to help me out leaving me the impression this was the most enjoyable morning they had in a long time.

Other than running late for work, which isn't my typical thing to do and fortunately it was excused, and having my car in the ditch, which was in great shape until they pulled me out ripping  my bumper, I am left with the memory of that cop's imagine of me playing  Duke's of Hazard.

What do you think the department guys and their families talked about at dinner last night? 


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